Letting Go and Becoming Enlightened Through Non-Attachment


Eastern wisdom holds the key to teaching us how to let go and find peace in our everyday life. This guide will break it down & explain it in plain English.

Source: The Beginner’s Guide to Letting Go and Becoming Enlightened Through Non-Attachment – Buddhaimonia –

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Live worth living


Thich Nhat Hahn explains the Four Qualities of Love that have the power to bring a deep meaning to our lives.

Source: The Four Qualities of Love

17 Things Only People With Mental Health Issues Know


It’s a flaw in your chemistry, not your character.

Source: 17 Things Only People With Mental Health Issues Know

New challenge 


So I’m embarking onto a new challenge…it’s not like I was ready for it..but life doesn’t knock at your door to ask “hey li are you ready for this? No? Ok…we’ll wait a bit then till you feel prepared to take this on” 🙂 

So, this is my firt time in a really really long time that I’m alone on my PMDD…alone as in no male companion…. This should be a good time for reflection on what specifically having a male companion actually does to my PMDD… Luckily the period app I have only 7 more days so I think I can handle a week;) it’s weird… Who should i get mad at? Who should I blame for intentionally trying to piss me off and trigger my PMDD? 

Let’s take a step back…. I’m not angry, at all. I only figured I’m PMDDing because I feel extra sad….but not enough to cry. Perhaps I’m feeling a bit ignored as well….. But this I can rationalize easily: ex needs time and space to heal, so he’s not pushing PMDD buttons rather going through the normal break up process….

The boys are with their dad who decided to do the halloween decorations and stuff with them…so they don’t need me…on one hand I’m quite thrilled that he’s putting the effort, on the other… I guess I feel alone? But again none of these four men is pushing my PMDD buttons…

So…. I’m not angry, like my PMDD usually makes me….rather I feel sad and alone. Which is ok. I can handle these two emotions. I know they will pass. Although they are heavy emotions at least I know how to handle them ….better than the anger that usually has external consequences as well….. 

Well, now that I’ve figured out what I’m feeling I think that I am more prepared for this week

I can handle it.

  

A Horrifying Week with My Borderline 


I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder last December, but that was only the beginning of my troubles. This is my diary of what came after.

Source: A Horrifying Week with My Borderline Personality Disorder | Broadly

5 Reasons To Start Putting Yourself First 


Have you heard the saying, “You’ve got to fall in love with yourself first”? Well if you want a truly amazing and abundant life, I’m telling you, you need to make it your mantra!

Source: 5 Reasons To Start Putting Yourself First – mindbodygreen.com

Happiness is something you learn


Metta

4 minutes of embracing happiness to yourself… and to others


Traditionally in metta, we make use of four aspirations. Using it with understanding seems to be the key to its effectiveness and so, one would really have to mean what one says. They are:

MAY I BE SAFE FROM DANGERS (Avero homi)
Can one be safe just by wishing? At first it appears to be just wishful thinking. But after examining deeper, it is not empty wishing. Mindfulness or clear awareness is involved. The pure wholesome mind can do wonders and the mind is very powerful. It’s not just there and then, done frequently even into daily activities, the clear awareness actually protects, apart from generating wholesome kamma. Even at that moment, the mind is kept away from the root causes of suffering—greed, hatred and delusion and keeps one away from misery. Encouraged in this manner, the mind increases its clarity and purity.

MAY I BE PEACEFUL AND FREE FROM MENTAL SUFFERING (Abyapajjho homi)

I have used “peaceful” instead of “happy” to emphasize on the wholesome aspect of happiness and peacefulness is, more obviously, the opposite of agitation and restlessness. Having saturated oneself with clear awareness, the peaceful nature of the mind becomes clear and inclines one to settle into a deeper state of contentment and rest.

MAY I BE HEALTHY, FREE FROM PHYSICAL SUFFERING (Anigho homi)

Mind and body are interdependent. Many physical illness are stress-related. Likewise, meditation can heal. Clear awareness, peacefulness and softness brings about physical comfort. Sweeping it downwards from head-to-toe, settles and tranquilizes both body and mind; while sweeping upwards from toe-to-head energizes and rejuvenates. If one allows it to stay longer at any affected part of the body, I believe it will have positive results for that part. Eventually the body will settle into a state of deep rest while the mind sinks into deeper tranquility.

MAY I TAKE CARE OF MYSELF AND LIVE HAPPILY (sukhi attanam pariharami)

This last aspiration summarizes the practice to be happy at all times. It conditions the mind to carry on in like manner in all of one’s activities. However, at the time of meditation, it will encourage the deepening state of awareness and tranquility.

Yes, to repeat—the deepening or development of aware- ness and tranquility. How else is there to help oneself best than to practise the spiritual awakening to everlasting peace? Vipassana (insight) itself is the best root condition for the development of metta. One then is truly happy, together with realization of the profound nature of existence.

Being BPD And…Reading Articles About BPD.


Reblogged on WordPress.com

Source: Being BPD And…Reading Articles About BPD.

How to Treat Borderline Personality Disorder 


Source: How to Treat Borderline Personality Disorder (Part 1) | Psych Central Professional

break ups… and positive thoughts


Ok…

so I know that for a breakup for “work” you need time.. and time means breaking everything that has to do with an ex-partner, and trying to literally pull away, physically and emotionally … and distance yourself from anything that has anything to do with your ex-partner… it’s an normal process.. healing… letting go, moving on…. and yeah, it takes time..

and even though i’ve had many break-ups.. (too many probably) … and even though I know it does pass… (doesn’t everything? … a few days ago I thought the awful anger and jealousy wouldn’t pass and they did)… a few months back when I started “staying” with an emotion I thought my head was going to explode each time and I would have given and done anything else BUT stick with it…. so I DO know that it does pass … I DO know that this feeling will pass… like clouds in the sky, like waves that hit the shore.. like a hurricane that dies out or a tornado that eventually dissipates… but now it hurts.. it hurts to be in the middle of the pain, to be inside the tsunami… and to not be able to do anything about it, but wait, wait for it to end.. as it does end… I know it does…

And while a part of me… (the one that wants to speed up the healing process) is telling me that it’s for the best, that some things just simply don’t work out, or that yeah, everything has its run, its course, its beginning and its end…….another part of me wants to remember the good things too…

We tend to turn our exes into villains …. we do that to protect ourselves, to solve the cognitive dissonance .. to explain to ourself or justify  the decision we took to end it all…. it makes the break up easier..

and yet…. we were with that person for a reason… we had good times, and bad too, such is life… but we chose to be with that person in that moment, in that context because we wanted to, because we felt good… that can’t be changed. we can’t take back the good memories just because we have some bad ones too… we can’t erase parts of our lives because “it’s easier”…. denial isn’t an option. what was, was… what’s done is done, what is, is…

so… i’m really going to try an exercise of positivity… why try to erase everything, when i’ve had some great moments too… i’ve done this in the past a lot… a LOT.. trying to just hate the ex, trying to forget EVERYTHING… yet.. it’s ALL part of who I am.. it’s all part of my life narrative… it’s done.. so why not focus on the positives?

here we go….

  • first date: so anxious, cutely, amazingly cute anxiety from both ends…
  • first gift: his hands were shaking and my voice was trembling… adorable
  • first kiss: I was all over him, I waited for him to make the first move, then I literally jumped him 🙂
  • chemistry….. i’ve probably only had similar chemistry once in my life with someone else… a long long time ago… weird how we could turn each other on sooooooo badly… the kisses, the caresses, the touch of his skin on mine, his arms around me, him kissing my neck,, me biting his, him holding me tight and keeping me close…. chemistry…. damn chemistry 🙂
  • enjoying the stars… on a dark night, just being …
  • him cutely imagining that he can handle my PMDD…
  • him sharing his vision of the world … so idealistic, fresh, refreshing… so much reminding me of a younger version of me… hopeful, determined… how I really wish he would remember how much he wanted to do, to change the world… and how I was feeling so refreshed by his ideas and desires….
  • letting him drive…how much I really liked seeing him do it, and practicing it, and being there while he was getting better at it…
  • spring grass… laying in in and looking at the blue sky… taking pictures of each other
  • the smile on his face…. so cute and sexy and kissable
  • his being there…. just being… listening, understanding…. being there for me… I really appreciate it
  • drinking on the terrace… while enjoying the nigh view… peaceful
  • being close… allowing myself to be vulnerable, vulnerable to the core… thus trusting him…
  • trusting him…. loving him…. it took so long to learn how to do that, yet eventually I did.. and it was a lovely feeling,,, the love, being safe, being close
  • mindfulness.. taking in the moment.. be it staring at each other or caressing…. or mindful sex….
  • him telling me “this too shall pass” … yes my love, this too shall pass…

I am a better person, I know myself more, I understand myself more now… I know what I’m capable of.. things that maybe I’d forgotten, or thought they were done… so I am thankful for the time we had together… for the laughs, the smiles, the cries… the hugs, holding on tight….

If I choose to remember the positives doesn’t mean I’m “holding on”.. it just means I choose to accept that I don’t want to erase anything…. it’s part of me, these months ARE part of me, of my life.. that can’t be changed or erased.. and I don’t want to.

Previous Older Entries

Recent Posts: MAKE BPD STIGMA-FREE!

Free conference on Borderline Personality Disorder – West Island Blog

Source: Free conference on Borderline Personality Disorder – West Island Blog

How to Raise a Unicorn: a Guide for Parents of Creative, Sensitive Children. | elephant journal

Source: How to Raise a Unicorn: a Guide for Parents of Creative, Sensitive Children. | elephant journal

Best selling US author’s campaign to tackle mental health issues comes to Northern Ireland – Belfast Live

Source: Best selling US author’s campaign to tackle mental health issues comes to Northern Ireland – Belfast Live

Recent Posts: DBT Peer Connections

Respecting Emotion & Regulating Emotion: An Introduction to Checking the Facts

Emotions are like a sixth sense because like sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell, they give us important information about our environment that we need to survive. What makes emotions so special is that they help us to act quickly when logical thought is too slow for us to engage in problem-solving. (See Situations below.) However, for people who may be unusually emotionally reactive, sensitive, or have learned to judge or invalidate their emotional sixth sense from culture, values, gender roles, parents, family, loved ones, etc., emotions may not always cause the expected effective response. Therefore, dialectical behavior therapy came up with the skill checking the facts to help us figure out if our emotional responses fit the facts and intensity of a situation and whether an unwanted or distressing emotion needs skills toward accepting and changing or skills toward accepting and tolerating.

Consultation Team Agreements for DBT Peer Support Specialists

Adapted from the Linehan Board of Certification by Rachel Cara Gill For DBT Peer Connections Facebook Group Administrators Consultation Team All DBT Connections Facebook Group Administrators are required to complete the FREE DBT Skills Training E-course prior to joining the consultation team Request to join DBT Peer Connections Facebook Skills Support Group as a general […]

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